My writing journey – personal and abriged

February 12, 2010

A year ago I had a dream that stuck with me when I woke up, so I typed it up the next day.  Then the characters started telling me their stories and I continued writing.  I gave it to a couple of people who came back and told me that there was nothing out there in ya like it, it was good and I should look at getting it published.  I had never considered getting published, I was writing for my kids.  So I continued writing and started searching the net to see what I needed to do to be published.

I had my finished, polished story and a list of agents to send it to, then I was put in bed with sun-poisoning and nothing to do but surf the web.  I found Absolute Write, where I was able to get a better query letter, and figure out how to write a synopsis.  As I was making friends and beginning to beta other’s works, I sent out my first query letter thinking, “This is it.  The perfect agent for me.”  I received my first rejection e-mail and was devastated – totally.  Oh, the rejection came less than three hours after I sent it out.

I sent out seven more queries, which were all rejected, but what I found by the third rejection was that it didn’t bother me anymore.  I had reached a Zen-state as far as querying was concerned.  After seven rejections I found a MAJOR flaw in my work: it began with my main character waking up…Big, huge, ginormous mistake.  No wonder everyone was rejecting it, I would’ve too.

I was already writing an edgy contemporary as I was querying so I focused on it, and sent my first manuscript to some betas and decided to wait.  As I waited, I wrote.  One of those betas said that the entire first chapter needed to be cut – the chapter those agents saw.  Kinda ironically funny, when you really think about it.

Fast forward to present.  I have a shiny, polished new manuscript ready to query.  It has been ready to query for three weeks but I’m dragging my feet on it.  Why?  I have no idea.  Things have been really crazy in my life for the past few months and for the past two weeks, I’ve been teetering on the edge of depression – standing at the chasm, walking a tight rope and trying not to fall in.  I’ve kinda hit a mid-life crisis at thirty-three but there are several constants in my life, things I know I want: my husband, my kids, my pets and my writing.

That all brings me to the purpose of this post: writing.  It took me over a third of my life to figure out what I wanted to do with it.  I played in college before I dropped out and got married, because I had no purpose. Last year, I found a purpose.  I love to write. I have stories in my head that want to get out and I want them out.  Do I believe I will find an agent and get published one day?  Yes.  Am I in a hurry?  Not right now.

This is what it all comes down to: what I can do for myself to take care of myself.  I’m back in that Zen-state I was in after the third rejection.  When my time comes, I will have the perfect agent for me and my work will be published.  And if it isn’t?  I will still write for me and my kids, but most of all I will write for my characters, who need to be heard.  That is my purpose, at this moment, in my life.




  1. Nice post, Jen! And go forth and query! It’s a tough journey—I know from personal experience, but you’ll never make it unless you try!

    Good luck!


  2. Jen! I feel 1000% just like you. I’m coming to that 30 marker too and writing has been a great way to help with that midlife crisis thing!! LOL Nice post! Remember we are here for you! *Hugs* 😀

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